The Tanglewood ballroom was loud with music and the chattering of restless guests as they mingled amongst themselves. Some remained at their assigned tables, eating cake. Others took to the dance floor. A few glanced at the clock as they awaited the new year. Or the moment they could go home.

Elle took it all in. The black and gold decor, the dim lights, the new song with a loud beat. Thick floral perfumes and spicy cologne entwined themselves with sweat, making the room suffocating. She needed fresh air and inched her way closer to the balcony. 

Former neighbors, Mr. and Mrs. Glover, came into view, eyes intent on her, and she bent down, pretending to pick something up. If they caught her, they’d rave about the wedding and what a fantastic job she did pulling it all together — and for raising her baby sister.

As if she had any choice in the matter. Children get little say when it comes to terminal illnesses. Neither do adults, for that matter. Still, what was Elle supposed to do? Let her baby sister cry for their mother, or pick her up? Offer Anne all the comfort and love Elle desperately needed. The promise to always keep her safe. To be there for her through thick and thin. To be brave for both of them.

At ten, she hadn’t known what lay ahead. The grief of another dead parent sending Anne spiraling towards an alcohol addiction. Late-night calls to pick her underage, drunken sister up from parties Elle had forbidden her to attend. The constant push to get her through high school while Elle juggled her own college classes. Anne resented her for all of it. And why not? It was the very essence of being a teenager, wasn’t it?

Elle waited until the Glovers found someone else to engage in conversation before she stood. Hesitated for a second as she watched Anne, face glowing with her beautiful smile, lean into Joch as the newlyweds slow-danced. Was it wrong to feel relief that the two were now married? That she no longer had to play mother to her little sister? 

Not that she minded it. Not entirely. It was more that Elle accepted it, because what else was there to do? But it came at the cost of putting her own life on hold. Aligning school and work schedules, constantly mending Anne’s broken heart, and the constant nagging suspicion that she was always failing. 

Someone called her name, and Elle slipped out onto the balcony, closing the door behind herself. The late December air stung her bare arms as she sucked in deep lungfuls of clean air. Up here on the ridge, she could look down over simple Pine Hollow and watch the meager offerings of the town.

The canning factory’s smokestack coughed gray into the night. Aspen Care’s many floors glowed as an ambulance pulled in. She might not be working tonight, but just watching, her heart rate sped up as if she were. Down there somewhere, one of those flickering porch lights belonged to the small home she and Zeke owned. Could she see it from here? Would she recognize its warm, welcoming yellow glow?

She turned her face skyward, the velvety blackness alight with a million pinpricks of light as the stars winked back at her.

“I hope you’re proud, Mama,” she whispered, her breath visible in small puffs. “I think I did my best. Anne is all grown up, and…” Her voice trailed off as reality sank in. 

Her sister wouldn’t stumble into the kitchen, bed hair making it difficult for Elle and Zeke to keep a straight face. She rubbed at the tightness in her chest and forced herself to take in another slow, deliberate breath. She wasn’t panicking. Why would she? I’m tired, that’s all. It’s been a long day. 

No more late nights curled up on the sofa making Zeke endure another round of chick flicks. She rubbed a little harder at her chest. Anne’s favorite was Pride and Prejudice, and even though Zeke hated it, he could quote Mrs. Bennet — and often did — causing Anne to groan and Elle to laugh hysterically. I need you to be brave, Elle.

The noise from the ballroom grew louder for a fraction of a second, and she swiped at the falling tears. The familiar aroma of cloves and cinnamon lifted her mood and made her smile before Zeke reached her. His shoes echoed on the balcony, and then his arms were around her. She exhaled slowly and rested against him.

“What are you doing out here?” he asked, rubbing her arms until warmth flooded through them again.

Who picks sleeveless dresses for a winter wedding, anyway? 

“Needed air,” she confessed, sliding her arms under his tux jacket. His body, solid and warm, temporarily stopped her chattering teeth as she leaned against his chest and enjoyed the steady beat of his heart. 

“You know,” Elle said. “This changes everything.”

“I know.”

She glanced up to find Zeke grinning at her.

“It means.”

He lowered his mouth to hers, and she melted into him. Slipping her arms around his neck, mouth opening to his. His hand slid up to cradle the back of her head, fingers threading gently through her hair, undoing the hours of work it had taken to put it up before the ceremony. He tasted of wedding cake and champagne as the kiss deepened. For a moment, the world narrowed to just them. Then he pulled back, chest heaving.  

“I can do that without embarrassing Anne,” he said.

Elle shook her head. “I meant, I’ve spent fourteen years playing mother to her, but she won’t need us anymore. And now…”

He pulled off his coat and wrapped it around her. “We’re alone in our own story, and it’ll be weird?”

“Yeah.”

He ran a thumb along her jaw before his hands settled at her waist. “Well,” he said, turning her to face the night sky again. “It’s time to make your wish.” 

Elle stared out over Pine Hollow again. It wasn’t much to look at, and most people dreamed of escaping the confines of this small place. They dreamed of making it big elsewhere — anywhere that wasn’t Pine Hollow. But not Elle. She and Zeke decided years ago that this was their home. Sure, it was small, but the people here had big hearts. They worked hard, bound together as a community to help each other, and knew how to find joy in the simple things. 

Summer movie nights in the park, lantern walks in the fall, and all the Christmas festivities at the Forester’s tree farm. Pine Hollow wasn’t perfect, but it was theirs to shape. Besides, it needed people like Zeke and Elle. 

Young families who built their lives here instead of abandoning the town. Still, what would she wish for? There wasn’t enough magic in any shooting star to bring her mother back — or her father. Anne was happy, and Elle had Zeke. 

“What on earth should I wish for?” she said, voice so low she doubted Zeke even heard the question over the shouts in the ballroom.

“Quick,” someone who sounded a lot like Anne said. “Get your champagne, only two minutes to go!”

“Anything in the world.” Zeke’s mouth was so close to Elle’s ear his words spread new goosebumps across her arms and up her neck, which had nothing to do with the icy temperature.

She glanced out over the town again, lingering for a fraction of a second on the road that took you straight to the interstate. To places far beyond Pine Hollow. Places she once dreamed of before she found her own happiness. Before she married Zeke.

“One minute to go!” There were squeals of joy and delight coming from the ballroom. The sound of chairs scraping and the shuffling of feet. The music shifted again, and the DJ started counting down from 60. 

“Didn’t we make a promise to each other?” Zeke asked, breath a whisper against her cheek.

 Elle couldn’t contain the smile as the memory came rushing back to her. It wasn’t so much a promise as a sacrifice — at least for Zeke. They’d stood a few miles from here on the viewing platform, staring out over the glorious scene that was Pine Hollow in the winter. Christmas lights twinkled from rooftops, and snow covered lawns, turned mountaintops white and transformed the Forester’s tree farm into a magical winter wonderland.

It was a rare moment to be alone, and Elle had wanted it to last longer than the ten minutes it had. They’d thought she was pregnant, but it turned out she’d miscalculated dates. That’s when they’d agreed their own family could wait until Anne was grown. When evenings wouldn’t be fraught with squabbles over her homework, weekends tense with her desire to party hard, and when they didn’t wake in the middle of the night to find Anne had snuck out — again.

There’d been a fraction of a second when she was certain Zeke had frowned that day, but it vanished so quickly she was never certain. They’d never spoken on the topic again, sidestepping well-meaning comments about starting a family with the agility of a sheepdog. But now, with Anne happily married, it was time for them to create their own happily ever after.

“Thirty seconds!” the DJ said, voice amplified through a microphone.

“Our own family?” Elle’s voice caught as she peered up at Zeke, who didn’t look away.

“You still want it?” 

The longing in his voice echoed the one in her body. The desire was palpable as she envisioned their home overrun with a half-dozen children. Reality told her there’d be squabbles and difficulties, but in her imagination she saw a baby on her hip, a toddler on Zeke’s shoulders, a preschooler clinging to his hand. Older children running ahead. Visions of holidays filled with laughter and chaos. Teenage years fraught with teaching more children to drive. Vacations to Turtle Lake with sand tracked throughout the house. Children’s art decorating the fridge. Family portraits on the fireplace.

“Ten seconds,” the DJ said, and a high-pitched squeal followed as he instructed everyone to grab a glass of bubbly.

I need you to be brave, Elle.

“Do you?” Elle asked, because she couldn’t say yes if he didn’t. Not after asking him to wait all these years. 

“Six, five…” The crowd joined the countdown.

Zeke smiled, and in the light of the moon his eyes sparkled. There was no need for words, because his face told her everything.

“Three, two…”

“Yes.” She wrapped herself around him. “A million times yes.”

“Happy New Year!” 

The crowd erupted in cheers as the band played Auld Lang Syne. Someone started singing the words, and others joined in the chorus. Off in the distance, fireworks lit up the night sky as cheers of Happy New Year continued to reverberate around them.

Zeke’s hands traveled down her waist until he was holding her up, his forehead against hers, breath heavy, chest heaving. The sight unlocked something deep in Elle, and she cupped his cheeks and kissed him. Mouth hungry to show him all the things she lacked the words for. He walked backward until her spine met the cold stone wall, and she arched into him with a sound she didn’t recognize as her own. His lips moved to her jaw, leaving a tiny trail of kisses. Then down her neck as she tilted her head back, eyes closed, lost in the sensation. Her fingers threaded through his hair, and he groaned.

“We should—” 

But she didn’t let him finish as she pulled his mouth back to hers. Now wasn’t the time to be sensible. Beside them, the balcony door crashed open, and they pulled apart.

“The newlyweds are about to leave.”

“Let’s see them off,” Zeke said, “and then go make a family.”

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